Thread

right now. i wish i had never said anything to hurt you.
i'm sorry and that i never meant to hurt you
i wish i never fought with you
i wish i made you happy
i wish i gave you what you wanted.
i wish i did everything you asked for
i wish i never broke your promises
i wish i had followed in your footsteps
i wish i was a better girl towards you
i wish i could prove to you all these things


on the other hand
i wish i could tell you
i never wanted you to hurt me
i never wanted you to insult me
i wanted you to be like every other guy
i wanted you to be the same ritualistic guy
i wanted so much from you
yet
i put down all expectations and did it your way

why do i give in?
why do i put myself through the torture.
you blame yourself
i blame myself
but
we still dont see eye to eye.

how do i turn back time?
and undo something i did?
how do i take away the pain
how do i forgive myself for all this?


why dont i try forgetting you?
because im incapable of doing such a horrendous thing?
yes i think so!
















your love it beckons deeply

edit: feelings change from the moment i saw you, till the moment you hung up on me


listening to: Vanessa Carlton - Nolita Fairytale



feeling: stupid



obsession: Not eating!





As i lay in bed, i wonder of all the things that could have been and would have been if you help onto the last piece of thread <3